DEPARTMENT OF THE TEASURY
INFERNAL REVENUE SERVICE

DIVISION OF INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIP
CONTROL AND REDUCTION

Form 1040-KT

This useful on-line calculator will help you determine what Kissing Taxes* you owe for the Tax Year 2011. Then print out the page and send it in, with your payment.

Enter in each window the number of kisses you delivered during the Tax Year 2011, in each of the five types in the drop-down menu. If none, enter "0". Entries are of course held in strict confidence, except from all other government departments.

Type of Kiss	Kisses Delivered in T/Y 2011	Tax Rate	Total Due

	Total Kissing Tax Due:

Note Regarding Form of Payment: A "dollar" has been defined by Congress as 24.057 grams of pure silver, so the number of silver grams you should send us is the total-due shown above multiplied by 24.057. If you don't have that amount of silver, you may substitute Federal Reserve Notes at the rate of 1.04 FRNs per silver gram. Just click here if you need help our help with that calculation.

* Liability for the Kissing Tax

Your liability to pay the Kissing Tax arises the same way as your liability for Income Tax - not from the written law (USC Title 26) but from the following.

1. The Courts have ruled it so. The US Constitution, Article 8*, empowers courts to create laws when Congress fails to do the job right, and they have used that power.

2. Protesters have been imprisoned. Quite a few smart alecs thought they could get away without paying their fair share and tried their luck in court. They lost.

3. The Federal Government needs your money. We have huge amounts to redistribute and debts to pay off and wars to wage, and we're running a deficit. You have to help.

4. Kissing is unhygenic, and the government has a responsibility for public health. Like any activity (such as productive work) by taxing it we can reduce its incidence.

5. We need you to depend on us, not on each other. Other people make unreliable friends, but Uncle Sam is here for you for ever.

6. Everybody knows there's a Kissing Tax, so don't fool around but just mail in the money. It's your duty.

* Some have failed to find Article 8, saying it does not exist. Keep looking! It is there, somewhere. It must be.

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